Apologies

There are a lot of difficult and hard tasks in this life. Some require great physical effort, some emotional strength, and others sheer will power. But of all the things that we are faced with in life nothing is harder for me than apologies. This past Tuesday I yelled at a 5th grader in the Chick-fil-A “play area”. I use quotation marks on that because if you have ever been in the “play area” then you may think that it would be better described “toddler tackle zone”, or “children’s cage of chaos.” With that said, the 5th grader mentioned above became the target of my papa bear aggression when his feet, wearing shoes (which I might add shouldn’t be in the “play area”) came within millimeters of inadvertently injuring my tiny Tyce. Feelings were hurt and I suddenly found myself in an unwanted conversation with the 5th graders parents, who up until moments after my loudly expressed desire for their son to remove his shoes and watch out for the little kids, were peacefully relaxing at the other end of the building. As the accusations and “he said she said” began to fly, I found myself wanting to stand my ground and keep my pride. I had acted and my son was safe, deal with it.

But no. Deep within I felt the ever louder groan of my spirit at war. My soul knew I had wronged this kid by raising my voice and his parents were here to defend him. My felt identity began yelling back at me, I’m a counselor, a youth minister, I know better than this, but my flesh kept trying to justify my action. This tiny play room for kids was on a quick road to an adult battleground. And then, fully against my will, but fully in line with the truth I have been taught, out popped the words, I’m sorry. The humiliation, the weakness, the sheer embarrassment of uttering those words was excruciating. But in my heart I knew I was wrong and needed to apologize.

Every ounce of my being fights and struggles to keep the words “I’m sorry” from coming out of my mouth. My soul seeks to be right in all that I do, and the mere thought of admitting that I, Beau, am wrong sends my pride charging in with a forceful “NEVER”.

As a Christian, I constantly deal with the struggles of sin, but more so I struggle with confessing that I sinned to others and asking for forgiveness. Proverbs 8 says: “To fear the LORD is to hate evil; I hate pride and arrogance, evil behavior and perverse speech.” Proverbs 11 says “When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom. The integrity of the upright guides them”.

God doesn’t ask us for perfection, though we should strive not to sin. Our prideful pursuit of our own perfection inadvertently leads to the hypocritical label we are sometimes given by our non-believing fellow man. Instead, Jesus teaches us in the Sermon on the Mount that we are called to settle matters quickly with our accuser or we may end up in front of the judge and suffer greatly for our actions.

This week I will spend some time meditating on these words from 2 Corinthians 12: “That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”


Other Posts You Might Like:

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Good Eyes - Bob Bentley

Witnesses - Andres Badillo

A New Word for the New Year - Casey McCollum

“That They May Be One” - Ross Thomson

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Location
McKinney at Cardinal

101 Cardinal Drive
Denton, TX 76209

940.387.4355

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Sunday Worship Schedule
8:30 - Worship (1st Service)
Attended Nursery (0-2yr). Children (3yr-4th grade) are dismissed during the sermon to attend children's church.
9:40 - Focused Fellowship
This is a time of fellowship and refreshments throughout the building. Children pickup before or after Kids Praise.
10:00 - Adult Bible Classes & Kids Discipleship
Adult Bible Classes - locations vary. High School & Middle School Discipleship Groups in the Youth area. Kids Praise for 3yr-4th grade. Nursery 0-2yr.
11:00 - Worship (2nd Service) & Kids Bible Class
Attended Nursery (0-2yr). Children (3yr - 8th grade) are dismissed during the sermon to attend Bible classes.

Wednesday Evening Schedule
5:30 - Fellowship Meal
Adults - $4 and Students/Children $3 (during the school year)
6:30 - Passion Worship
Praise and worship time in the Worship Center.
6:30 - Celebrate Recovery
Celebrate Recovery is a Christ-centered, 12-step recovery group that provides a safe place to address and deal with life's hurts, habits and hang-ups.
7:00 - Bible Classes & Small Groups
Classes for children and adults of all ages and other ministry groups meet at various locations throughout the building.

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